In the name of love
The other day, in a drink, a friend told me that there are people who control their children by phone. They say they're monitored and, in this way, they know where they are at all times, regardless of where their parents are. I don't know to what extent this mode of control comes, I guess it depends on the application, but whoever wants to know someone else's location all the time will probably have no problem overcoming all the privacy limits.
Anyone would say that they only want to protect children. But it is really hard to “protect” anyone from the possible risks, if we are not where it occurs. “Let’s see if someone brings them!”, I would throw another one, but in the meantime, ignoring reality and probabilities, we leave them without care in the hands of my uncle, cousin, grandpa, father... What is normal, on the other hand, is that it cannot live in fear.
But control is not a protection.
Are there limits to human rights? At what age does a person have the right to privacy?
All of us – I would say without exception – are alive by chance. Surely you remember some time when your lives have been in danger or have been in danger. For we have all done things of Christ, and not as a child. And we remember that moment, precisely because it was important to us in the learning process; otherwise, we would have forgotten it already.
Control only indicates one thing: that we are in a relationship of dependency, anywhere, since the dominator has more need of the dominated than the dominator's defeated. And behaviors are the ones that are learned and repeated.
You learn to live in the same way that you do in science: by trial error. And test failures just have to be committed by yourself. Adults can only provide tools for life, tools for thinking and deciding. And pray for them to be useful and make the right decisions at every moment. And if the decision isn't good, let them learn from it next time. As we do constantly while we die.
If you're biting or biting in high school, parents are now informed that they're doing it the same day. So teenagers don't learn to live around, so they don't become adults. We have to find out from the parents' whatsapp group about all the children's responsibilities, control everything to the last detail, and so prevent children from taking on those responsibilities. Children have our need, of course, but it often seems that we have much more need to feel dependent on them.
Control is not a refuge and much less love.
Control only indicates one thing: that we are in a relationship of dependency, anywhere, since the dominator has more need of the dominated than the dominator's defeated. And behaviors are the ones that are learned and repeated.
Who will explain to adolescents that they cannot control all the phones and movements of their partners if so far we have done the same? How can we explain that love is not in that if we ourselves have done it “in the name of love”?
Are we creating people in bondage? Will they be eternal subjects or will they have to master another? How are we going to explain to boys and girls (especially girls) that independence is their most precious treasure, which they have to defend at all costs? How will we explain that the independence of the other makes us independent? Is it more, will you understand what independence is without ever having it?
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