The media have opened an investigation: Almost a third of women born between 1975 and 1979 will have no children. The newspaper El País narrates the "drama" of women who will not be mothers "as long as they wait" in the White House of Bilbao. According to the experts, mostly men, one of the reasons is precariousness, another is to find a stable relationship of partner “too late”. According to these male experts, means must be put in place to fulfill women’s “reproductive dreams”, for example, free childcare. The Spanish State has become the European country that most delays motherhood, due to the lack of adequate reconciliation policies. Isidoro Bruna, a member of the Spanish Fertility Society, gives another reason: the lack of awareness of women. That is, we do not take into account that our “ovarian reserve” is exhausted, we believe that, like Anne Igartiburu, at age 45 we will be able to become pregnant. We are stupid and irresponsible.

The suffering and frustration of women are also present in the reports I have found on this subject in other media. They always talk about motherhood, not paternity. Couples are mentioned – all men – and they also appear in the photos, but their testimony is not collected and the percentage of men who will not bring children to the world is not fixed. There are few women who enjoy the decision not to be a mother and there is no mother who regretted having children.

Expert men say that women of my age have to be attentive, we cannot forget the ticking of a watch. Forget it? Is it possible to forget it? The advertising of reproductive clinics is everywhere; the media is constantly talking about the demographic crisis, and in the family we have to listen to things like “not going to spend a lot of time”. Well, if we're lesbians.

We've won the fight for the right to abortion, but patriarchal society has more tools to control our utars. For example, if we “expect too much”, the threat of what we will be miserable.

Meanwhile, around me, many are clear that they want their children; many are clear that they don't want them. Others live the decision to be a mother with many doubts, difficulties, pressures and fears. But when it comes to making that decision, we are freer than our mothers and our grandmothers. We know that not having children is an option. We also have the opportunity to break the radioactive nuclear family. Without a husband, with our partner of women, or taking advantage of the models of polimicity, we can create families. Yes: We are going to meet the discrimination policy of the Spanish Government.

In the “tribe”, in the community, there is a lot of talk about the educational model, but above all about the mothers. Reading the testimonies of women who have not fulfilled the “dream” of motherhood – I would say “power” – I had an idea: that need to “have” a child is what capitalism has created. That the nuclear family is an individualistic model, related to private property. There are people who have not had children, but they help educate children, like grandchildren or children of friends. If we were to opt for a model of community family, those who have no possibility of having children might not feel that feeling of failure, because they would have their role in the tribe. To start, to shake fears and break clocks, let’s put a smile on the image of the “old cat crazy”. n